10.21.2009

Day 68--- I Would Walk 500 Miles...


Have you ever been to a mall and had some elderly persone come whizzing past you in a wind breaker and sweatpants? Well I have, and I will admit it was quite a sight to see. In fact, I hate malls, but now I go back weekly just to watch this intense group of individuals work it out from Sears to JcPennys... Unfortunately I don't have any hard numbers, but based on minimal research I discovered that this is a popular daily event in most malls across the great United States... Wow, arent we innovative???

The first time I saw a group of people doing this I could not help but laugh, (and the second and the third and the fourth and the fifth and so on...). I though it was some sort of a joke, or that I had accidentally stumbled onto the set of a Fatboy Slim video. Boy was I wrong. There are actually groups of people who wake up daily, throw on full workout attire (sweatbands included), drive down to their local mall and go for a nice speed walk. Some even break a sweat, (thus being able to utilize the sweatbands).

Clearly this is one of those activities that is more popular among senior citizens, I imagine this is for many reasons. First, because they dont mind looking silly to the general public, I mean, they go around pooing their pants and pretending to love Bingo, clearly appearance is not their top priority. Also, they have the time, when you are retired you tend to look for things to fill up your time, at our age its hard enough to find time to run around the blocks a few times or go to a gym a few blocks away. Yet these old folks are up at 5 am looking for something to do to keep them busy when they are over knitting sweaters. I dont hate them for that, I dont even dislike them, but I will laugh at them (its my right as an American), its fantastic they are staying active, I guess its just the venue they have chosen that has me so interested.

This apparently is not a passing fad either, there are actually a "Mall Walkers Association of America" and you know with a name that provocative and heartwarming this group is in for the long haul. My only suggestion on this one is that I really feel that they need to make it a little bit more exciting for the rest of us though. If they are going to be weaving in between Victorias Secret and I, I'm going to eventually need something that keeps me from getting annoyed with them. Maybe a weekly race? Maybe even bi-weekly, or maybe they give the "mall-shoppers" a chance to place bets, that keeps it fun for everyone. Maybe they could even throw in a relay race, oh goodness I'm getting excited just at the thought of it. My money is on the team with the most hair, I know the others appear to be more aero-dynamic, but the hair makes my team more youthful, oh gosh think of the potential... Just a thought.

11 comments:

ScoMan said...

When I started walking to work old people whizzed past me all the time.

Now that I've been walking every day for a long time, I'm better prepared, and I'm starting to get some revenge.

mysterg said...

What a fantastic idea!

Dave "Loose Cannon" Wills said...

Lol. Keep em coming. I'm definitely reading each day...

I think these speed-walking seniors are hilarious. I'm now going to keep my eye out each time I go to the mall.

kaloo said...

How nice to hear about somebody who isn't an asshole. I think I couldn't do that.

Jenn of the Jungle said...

A lot of the mall walkers like to walk thee for two reasons, it's usually flat and it's safe.

I think they are kinda cute.

Tracie said...

I think they do it for the safety reason, but also for the air conditioning. You might just see me doing this one day, because when I'm old, if my doctor tells me to start walking every day I am definitely not going to do it outside in the heat!!

Kelly said...

Heehee! I used to work at a cafe attached to a mall, we had a cute little group of old ladies who would follow their group power walking session with us, they were delightful!

carissajaded said...

Oh I used to have to go walk with my grandad at the mall when I was a kid, and he still does that, so yeah.. not going anywhere. I think they do it because they like to see all the others. We would walk 5 steps then stop and talk to other old people...

Nomad said...

gotta love em!

magda said...

Oh how hilarious! My grandma goes mall-walking every day, but at an insanely early hour. She told me the other day that she's planning at Christmas to alter her schedule a little bit to be there when stores are actually open. That's just nuts to me, but strangely adorable, too.

Secretia said...

I think it's good business for the malls too, as those people probably talk to their friends abour the stores.

Related Posts with Thumbnails