Day 189--- One Drop at a Time...

I am so glad that I got to enlighten people on the amazingness that is "butterface's"... They really are one of the most useful things you will learn in your entire life, anytime you are out and point out a butterface, you have instantly thrust yourself into the comedic spotlight for the next hour, trust me I've done studies... Now I am going to talk about a group of people today that each and every one of us has no doubt come into contact with. Are you ready for this? Its a random one... Here we go... People who freeze their water bottles.

You may ask yourself why I would be interested in this group, allow me to explain. Its not so much the idea of freezing the water, this makes sense, we all like our water to be cold... But what amazes me is their dedication to the cold water process. You see, I have tried this before, but I literally sat there licking the top trying to get it to melt for about the first 2 hours away from the house... At that rate I am only going to finish about half of the water by the time I'm done at work... And if you are really dedicated to the art form and manage to make it past the ice licking stage, the only bonus that you get are little sips... If you are really strong and you make it all the way through the day without drinking until it thaws out entirely you have about 13 minutes before that very cold water is just water...

As silly as you guys may think it is that I would choose to write a whole post about these people I want you to just think about how much going through this process really says about somebody... Yeah, that's right I'm going deep in the shallowest way possible here... You know by the fact that they freeze their bottles daily that they are obviously people who like to be well prepared and they are also pretty frugal. Otherwise they would just buy a new one every day, or fill up as they run out the door... The next, and perhaps most telling thing, is that they are clearly the type of people that are willing to wait for their rewards. They must be patient, because like I said if I am thirsty I am drinking this water one thawed drop at a time, but I have seen them wait for the entire bottle to thaw before drinking... It doesn't even seem worth it to me at that point to have to wait hours just to be able to drink cold water... At this point you guys probably think I am stoned or drunk to be talking about this mess for so long, but I'm not... I was just bored out of my mind at work today on a phone call staring at my water bottle... And for some reason I thought about all the times I have witnessed these people and thought about all this stuff to myself... So I figured it was just about time to share it with you guys...

I don't really expect you all to take a whole lot out of this, but what I do expect is that the next time you see someone with a frozen water bottle you will think about me and smile... And when that happens an angel will get his wings and I know my job has been done... Or something like that...

And that is what diarrhea of the brain looks like in blog form.