4.02.2010

Day 193--- Assistant To the Regional Manager...


This is going to be the first time I have posted two days in a row in far too long... When I think back I cant believe that I posted these things everyday for like 125 days straight... Gotta get back in the groove... If you have ever worked a day in your life you have no doubt encountered today's bags of douche... They have been given so very many names over the years but today I shall start by referring to them as the power trippers....

A majority of the time these people will come in the form of a manager of some sort, whether they be higher or lower on the totem pole is really irrelevant to the stimulation that even the slightest taste of power will give these people... If you have ever worked in retail, the food industry, or any other business with a pyramid scheme of bosses you know exactly what I am talking about... For these half-breeds it does not even matter if they are just filling in as a supervisor for a day, their true colors are sure to come out at some point... I have not run any studies, but it is my strong belief that these people were the ones who grew up with no friends... And if there were people that pretended to like them, then they most certainly were not given any power in the friendship, no choosing what to play, what to watch, what to eat... They basically had the follow the other kids around just to be accepted into a group... They lived this way up through high school, always following never having the chance to lead, not even being selected to pick first in Heads-Up Seven-Up... They float out into the workplace with the same set of skills, accept for once you are working where they want you to follow, it actually starts getting them noticed... Before you know it they are asked (because of their attention to following rules and all that stuff that cool people don't do) if they would like a spot on the management team, basically to help enforce the rules from another angle. Without hesitation they accept, spawning one of the most evil beings known to man...

Instantly they squeeze every once of power that they can out of their new position... No doubt making up a set of nonsense bullshit rules along the way... There is a good chance that these people will also be huge advocates of busy-work, something I have never been a fan of... You could be completely done with all necessary work and standing a round for a breath, when they will come say something snarky like "we are not paying you to stand around, why don't you find something to do?"... To which I would like to reply, "Blow me" but I have learned the hard way they may be allowed to fire you. In case you are still confused, the most famous power tripper that comes to mind is Dwight from The Office... If you know the show you know the bit about him being assistant to the regional manager, but he always says assistant regional manager, yeah you get it...

See I have been a manager before and thankfully I didn't slip into this territory, I found that giving respect, you get it, and people will be much more willing to help out and do shit when you ask them... Rather than fake it when they see you coming and then go right back to doing nothing when you are gone... I think that these P.T.'s must not realize that this is exactly what we all do... We nod, act like we are going to pick something up, take out the trash, run food, fold something, but as soon as you look the other way our thumbs are right back up our asses, where they belong...

5 comments:

Kyle said...

Is it hard to type these blogs with your thumb up your ass? If so, I hope you clean your keyboard afterward.
In truth, I have worked with a number of these tools. They always the ones with something to say in a meeting whether it's related or not. I hate meetings with these people because they always run long into time we should be doing work.

ScoMan said...

I work with one of these people.

Every time the boss is out of the office, or even if he isn't, she walks around like she has total power.

And she's not a manager of any sort. She's just worked there longer than any of us, and so feels she is entitled to tell us what to do.

If she sees me taking a breath, she'll often say "Why don't you do some research?".. I'm waiting for the day I get the courage to say "Because I already know a lot more about this than you do, and I thought it would be nice of me to give you the opportunity to catch up"

But she has got people fired by going to the boss and saying "Either fire them, or I quit".. which only feeds her power and makes her feel stronger.

*LLUVIA* said...

I worked with someone like that. Sadly, these type of managers aren't people persons! They might know the policies and manuals by memory, but they DO NOT know how to be managers.

I too, supervised a group. I too, learned that respecting them and listening to their needs was a lot more productive than treating them like shit, just because you might make a dollar more than they do!

Allyson said...

HEADS UP SEVEN UP!!! totally forgot about that game!!! whatever teacher came up with that game is a genius!

Amanda West said...

Haha. I feel you. I used to work for Gap as a cashier. We had a head/store manager and four assistant managers.


One of the assistants thought he was like god or something. It was horrible. I wanted to cry when I got to work and found out I'd have to be closing the store with him. I'd end up doing my job AND his... Or risk losing my job.

Gah, I'm so glad I quit.

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